Ahh, Young Lust

My weekend has been filled to the brim with estrogen which can be a nice change every once in a while. I went to see a chick flick with my mother and sister and since we live at opposite ends of the valley, we met at the theater. I arrived first and bought tickets for all of us then sat down to wait. My wait was longer than it should have been since my mother apparently didn't hear me correctly and tried to go to another set of theaters, also by a Chinese restaurant, just not the right one. While I was waiting I had the great privilege of sitting in the lobby near two couples who I doubt are even old enough to have drivers licenses. The "couple" closest to me was nauseatingly cutesy and just..... dumb. I will reconstruct the conversation as it happened. But first let me set the stage. The girl who we will call Kim is wearing a WAY too short levi skirt and fur lined boots. (I think they were Ugs, but I don't know for sure) The boy who we will call Joe is dressed in the typical teenager in angst apparel. Skinny jeans, the obligatory Ramones t-shirt and hair long enough that he could be mistaken for a girl. (In fact I think they had the same haircut) Kim is sitting on Joe's lap even though the bench we are on is 30 feet long and no one else is sitting on it.

Joe: You are so beautiful. You are the beauty queen and I am the drag queen."
Kim: You are so sweet to me! (kissy noises as they peck at each other)
Joe: "What if I was horribly disfigured? What would you do?"
Kim: "I would pay for your plastic surgery. And maybe dump you, depending on your ugliness."
Joe: "Thanks a lot. I would stand by you no matter what happened!" (more kissing)
Kim: "I really want you to try your best not to say anything mean about me."
Joe: "Umm, ok."
Kim: "Don't even think it. Okay never mind, just don't say it out loud."
Joe: "Only if you grow out your armpit hair."
Kim: "Ewww, that's gross. No way."
Joe: "It's not negotiable."
Kim: "If it's not negotiable, then I am right!" (Obviously she doesn't understand what negotiable actually means.)

There was more including a bit where they discussed robbing the cash drawer at the theater and running off to Mexico together, at which point I wanted to ask them if their parents would be dropping them off at the border or if they would hijack the school bus. It was a huge relief when I heard my sisters voice coming from the parking lot. In some ways observing a teenage interaction like that makes me realize that maybe I am grateful for my inexperience as far as young lustful relationships go.