The Wedding Epidemic

I think there is something in the air besides the smog of traffic from the backed up I-15. There has been an explosion among my group of friends of wedding engagements. I have three receptions to go to in the next 2 weeks. I guess anything above one is an improvement over last year. So it seems that love is in the air. I have some suggestions for the recently or soon to be engaged, and any of those that may know the aforementioned:

• Strategically placed hands in the wedding photo to show off the ring never looks natural, it always looks awkward and silly.
• Receptions during the middle of a weekday ensure that most of your friends in the working class can't go. You might as well not have one. There is no rule saying you have to.
• I'm not one for painting my nails and all that girlie stuff, but realize that when you get engaged everyone is going to want to see the ring, so a manicure would not be out of order.
• If someone is kind enough to throw you a shower, don't then go and tell everyone that it is at a different location and that the theme that was previously chosen is no longer valid thereby negating everything that person had already put in place. *See below for explanation
  
• There is certain etiquette for bridal showers, this includes finding out who will be there and what kind of gifts are acceptable. (ie lingerie) Nothing is more embarrassing to the bride than opening up something kinky in front of her mother and/or soon to be mother-in-law. In some families it is acceptable, but know your audience first.
• If you live in a house with roommates and all of you know the happy couple, don't expect an invitation for each person. It's just going to go on the fridge with the 4 others you've received this month so don't complain, invitations can be expensive.

*The following story took place at a time when I was more timid and basically a push-over. Several years ago I was sharing this adorable downtown apartment with my best friend of just over 10 years. She had gotten engaged and as her friend I asked if I could throw her a shower, to which I was told that I could. Seeing as how this was my best friend and everything, I wanted to make it special so I handmade the invitations. They were black and white and resembled the slapper things that you see when viewing uncut footage of a movie, they had moving parts and everything. I made the invitations to reflect the theme "Movies" the idea being that if you're favorite movie was "Sleepless in Seattle" then you would bring bedding or something to that affect. I thought it was a cute idea. So after I had sent out all the invitations my friend came to me and said that she didn't like the idea and that she had already called everyone. Instead of having it at a quite picturesque location at the mouth of Big Cottonwood Canyon, my friend informed me that the shower would now take place at her aunts house. Oh, and the theme thing was out. I, being the ever accommodating person, smiled through the crushing pain and gave up control to the bride-to-be. There was some equally insulting and extremely disrespectful behavior on the part of this "friend" before she got married, ending with her threatening to sue me over the pettiest thing IN THE WORLD. This incident actually ended up being the catalyst for me to stop taking crap from people and stand up for myself. Needless to say, we are no longer friends. (And that's the edited short version!)